I made dinner the other day and I told him I needed to test it to make sure everything was hot all the way through. Riley told me not to because we hadn't said the prayer yet. I ignored him. Which subsequently turned into this...
"Please bless this food that it can provide us with the strength we need to get through the rest of the day (etc etc) And please bless that Alyssa won't go to Hell for eating a string bean before the prayer." Was he kidding? No. When I giggled he continued, "And also please bless that Alyssa will learn how to be reverent".
Every once in awhile I make Riley fix his eyebrows. And by that I mean, I make him let ME fix his eyebrows. He tells me he wouldn't care if he developed a uni-brow (lie). After much arguing and me threatening to not go out in public with him, he'll give up and get me the tweezers. But the fun doesn't end there. You will later hear him make such remarks as, "That one was connected to my brain!", "Oh BOB SAGET!", and "I think I'm internally bleeding after that one. Call Jack, I need a doctor". (The last one was after he insisted on watching LOST all the way through).
-Frequently I'll find empty Capri Sun packets. In our shower.
-When Riley picked up Benny from the vet after his two night stay, I texted Riley from work to see how he (Ben) was doing. Riley's response, "He has taken a pee and a radioactive poop, and now he's in bed next to his food and a fresh bowl of water." He really knows how to settle a girls worries.
-When we went to Caesar's Palace a few months back, Riley asked the concierge "Is this the REAL Caesar's Palace? Did the REAL Caesar actually live here?" Note to self, never dare Riley to do ANYTHING you don't want him to actually do.
-He nicknamed the slightly overweight (obese) lady that used to live above us, "Tromposaurus Rex".
-I quit asking Riley to help me "pick up the house" because the only response I ever got was, "I can't. It's too heavy".
-I took him on a surprise trip to Disneyland last year for his birthday. I packed all his bags, put a purse over his head and drove him to the airport. When we got there he said, "No way!! You got a back stage showing of the airport?!" Dead serious. It didn't even cross his mind we were going somewhere?
-Once I walked in the front door to Riley singing/belting out, "LOVE me, LOVE me, SAAAY that you love me! Fool me, fool me, go on and fool me.." in the shower.
I got lucky :)
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